My Father, the Hypocrite

Maverick here. Um, this is ridiculous. Yes, my ears runneth over with black stuff. They've done that for years. Bacteria and yeast, you know. At least the infection is pretty much limited to the right ear these days. But for some reason, my parents get all aggressive with my condition every now and then, and I'm now living through one of those months. Two cleanings every day, which involves much squirting of various substances into my ear and those horrible cotton balls, which aren't as soft as advertised when Mom is rubbing them against bloody, inflamed ear skin. And that medicine? It burns, burns, burns like a ring of fire.

And who is Mom's accomplice in this? Dad, who can't hear much of anything right now. And do you want to know why? Because the tubes in his ears are completely blocked by some stubborn infection, and have been that way for over a week. He says he's seeing a doctor on Monday, and that the ear problem is related to a lingering cold, and blah blah friggin' blah. I'm just left to wonder, why isn't Mom shoving cotton balls up Dad's ears twice a day? And why aren't I holding him by the face so he doesn't jerk suddenly or run away? That, my friends, would be justice.

And it would also be awesome. Squirt squirt, Dad!